5) Dominick The Christmas Donkey – Lou Monte
So the children of Italy don’t have Santa to look forward too according to Lou Monte, but a
rather dim donkey called Dominick. Released back in 1960, this incredibly cheesy, plodding track is the epitome of everything that’s bad with the novelty song. Pointless, stupid and without any real tune.
The worst thing of all though was this nearly the Christmas number one last year after another backlash towards The X Factor and Chris Moyles nearly got the terrible novelty song to the top of charts.
4) Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer – Elmo and Patsy
Nothing says family and togetherness like an elderly relative getting killed by rampaging
reindeer right? Well, that’s the story according to husband a wife singing duo
Elmo and Patsy, whose 1979 effort is still haunting the season.
If this rather dodgy basis isn’t enough to put you off, then the awful, reedy vocal should be
enough to make you go running out into the road just in case a careening sled
might knock you down and end the experience early.
3) Boys and Girls (Xmas Time Love) - The Cheeky Girls
2) Please, Daddy (Don’t Get Drunk This Christmas) – John Denver
We all know that country music and booze go hand in hand, but John Denver has managed to
mix both of those with Christmas and create this monstrosity.
A tale of a boy pleading with his alcoholic father not to lay off the sauce in order to not
make his mother sob the holidays away sounds just about as awful as it sounds.
Thank goodness it’s only two and a half minutes long. Any longer and we might not have been
able to take it.
1) Christmas Shoes – Newsong